OceanicThai

The Thai “wai” is so much more than a casual greeting here in Thailand. It means more than hello or goodbye; it also expresses honor, respect, and thanks. It is a gesture that reveals Thai values and attitudes. It can convey what might remain unspoken but deeply felt. Sometimes even hidden feelings can be expressed in a “wai,” as well as underlying attitudes. There is no equivalent that I know of in the Western world to the Thai “wai.” Slights are readily read into a sloppy or a half “wai” from one person to another, and it can even cause loss of face. As your language progresses, you will also be expected to understand the implications of your “wai.” In earlier years, in my ignorance, even as I was attempting to be sensitive, I have inadvertently offended Thai people. These are not issues that can be discussed easily with the offended or offending person because of the careful avoidance of confrontation in Thailand. A “wai” should be slow and graceful if at all possible. Fast, sloppy...

king cobra , a photo by oceanicthai on Flickr. Trying to get this picture back where it belongs...

If you have ever been a guest at a social gathering or at someone’s home in Thailand you were probably impressed with their incredible hospitality and ability to make you feel like a VIP. As soon as you show up they hurry to greet you and take care of you. Perhaps you noticed that they made sure you had a refreshing drink and refilled it for you several times. Perhaps you also noticed they made sure you had a comfortable place to sit and fed you freshly prepared or opened snacks. If they had food, you were sure to notice that they served you and probably served you first, making sure you had a good portion of the best meats or shrimp. They were extremely attentive, asked questions about you, listened to all you had to say, complimented you, and made you feel like, well, royalty. For a westerner, it is truly an amazing experience. The Thais know how to treat you like a superstar! On the flip side, as we take those steps to become friends with real Thai adults, we must also learn how to...

Body language and facial expressions are so important in Thailand they often trump words as to what is being communicated and believed about a person.  Courtesy and respect is communicated not merely by words, but how one holds the body while talking, or the expression on the face while listening to the Thai speaker. I think it is helpful to think of proper etiquette as being gentle, slow, and graceful. Abrupt movements or careless, flinging hand movements can communicate aggression and lack of respect. Being sensitive to subtle body language and indirect replies will also help to avoid confusion and misunderstandings. For example, it is difficult for a Thai to say no, so their "no" may be communicated by a hesitant look on their face even as they say "yes". A tensing of their face and body may communicate displeasure or disagreement, even as they give a tight smile and agree with you verbally. Making an effort to watch Thais interact with elders, strangers and o...

I have been asked to share a couple of life-lessons from my 13 years here in Thailand. I am touched that someone has asked this thoughtful question. A Few Things I've Learned Through The Years 1. Being a language learner is an excellent ministry tool. Thais love to help you learn their language. If you tell them you want to teach them something they may respond negatively, and you may not be able to teach your subject very well even if they consent to be taught. Asking them to help you learn a subject in Thai will make the experience pleasant for them, and help you get better in the language. I have a book that Thais have helped me with over and over again, the Creation to Christ Firm Foundations book. 2. Language will take you deeper into people’s lives. Never be satisfied with your current level of language. I remember sitting at a creek listening to a teenager pour her heart out to me and I really couldn ’t understand her. How could I possibly speak to her heart if I wasn...

Compassion is a worthy feeling, so is concern, empathy, and a desire to make a difference. These, however, are only the beginning of what really matters, and that is our actions. It is not enough to feel compassion and empathy for someone who is suffering, or a people group who is suffering, there must be movement of our hands, mouths and feet to make a difference. I am reminded of a short story written of a young man who visits a brothel for the first time and is horrified at what he sees. The degradation of the women moves him to great compassion and he agonizes over what he has seen and how it may be amended. After many sleepless and tormented days and nights of considering what must be done to stop such a blight, he is overwhelmed by the hopelessness of it all and gives up. What strikes me about this story is that it is often repeated in our own lives. We see injustice, we see evil, and we are horrified by it, but we are unsure of what to do, how to stop it, what difference our own...

I chose to wear a skirt for my first day of volunteer work at the center. Put together, capable, clean and professional. If I wear jeans I will look sloppy and unable to function in the role I will be taking there. I will wear jeans later. I love wearing jeans, soft old ones, with a soft old t-shirt. I will be sure to take a shower in the morning. Most Thais bathe their children before school and take a shower before they come to work or eat dinner. 2 showers a day is standard, 1 shower a day is barely hygienic , and not so hygienic in the hot months. It took me years to understand how sensitive the average Thai nose is to bodily odors. Especially ours, since we smell funny to them, being foreigners. My Thai friends still feel a bit miffed that my kids don't take showers before school, and I only take one shower a day unless it's really hot. It makes sense that a Thai kiss is a sniff.